Editing Gerard Manley Hopkins (section)

== '''Social Relationships and Asperger Traits''' ==
Hopkins’ social life was markedly limited and characterized by the detachment and naïveté typical of an Aspie. As an adult he formed only a few close friendships, mostly intellectual or spiritual in nature. He maintained an intimate correspondence with Robert Bridges (later Poet Laureate) but otherwise had scant social circle. By his own admission, ''“I have no instincts in personal life”'' and felt ''“unnatural with all who are not intimate friends”'', reflecting the social impairment of Asperger’s.

Hopkins often appeared painfully shy or awkward in casual interactions. He ''“didn’t mix much outside of work”'' or religious duties, finding secular socializing trivial. In gatherings of his Jesuit peers, he was the quiet figure in the corner or the one who would abruptly interject with an esoteric observation, then lapse back into silence. This pattern – ''“either remains silent or else plunges straight into what matters to him”'' – has been noted in Asperger individuals and fits contemporary accounts of Hopkins’ demeanor.

Romantically, Hopkins led an almost completely celibate life consistent with his vows and, arguably, an asexual or low-sexual-interest disposition. He never pursued marriage (as a priest he could not), but even before his ordination there is no evidence of typical courtship. Biographers have speculated that Hopkins struggled with homosexual feelings towards close male friends in his youth, which he sublimated into spiritual love or poetry. Whether or not that is true, Hopkins’ general naivety about sexuality was clear.

For example, when one acquaintance made a ribald joke in his presence, Hopkins failed to understand it and reacted with literal seriousness – an ''“innocent,” literal-minded response'' in line with autistic social understanding. His letters and journals show an ''“emotionally naive, immature personality”'' with regard to romantic matters. Like some other Asperger figures, he seemed to lack innate “instincts” for courtship or flirtation, approaching love in an abstract, idealized way (if at all). Fitzgerald notes that certain geniuses ''“were personally just not interested in sex…prim and shy about sexual matters”'', traits which Hopkins exemplified. Indeed, his one known quasi-romantic attachment – a deep admiration for a younger male poet, Digby Dolben – was expressed through spiritualized poetry and letters, not physical or typical romantic expression.

Social gatherings frequently left Hopkins anxious or exhausted, indicating sensory and social overload. He often excused himself from communal recreation to take solitary walks, a behavior seen in many on the spectrum to self-regulate. Hopkins’ strong preference for solitary nature walks and contemplation was noted by peers as “otherworldly.” As one colleague observed, ''“He needs an audience to which he can discourse…but is not comfortable one-to-one”'', noting that Hopkins was ''“not at ease with individuals”''. This aligns with the Asperger profile of enjoying formal, one-directional communication (like giving a sermon or lecture) while struggling with reciprocal interpersonal engagement.

Additionally, Hopkins had peculiarities in nonverbal communication: he avoided eye contact and had a stiff, ungainly posture in company. His face often bore a blank or intense expression that colleagues found hard to read, lacking the usual social cues – possibly an example of the ''“flat or inappropriate affect”'' sometimes seen in ASD. Those who met him sometimes perceived him as austere or overly serious (one described him as “a man who never smiled at small talk”). This impression resonates with the observation that individuals with Asperger’s can appear humorless or overly earnest due to difficulties with casual social banter.

Interestingly, Hopkins felt most comfortable in structured or hierarchical social situations – for instance, as a priest guiding penitents or teaching students – where roles and topics were predefined. In those contexts, his Asperger traits (formal speech, encyclopedic knowledge, moral absolutism) could come across as authority and expertise. However, in unstructured social environments he floundered.

The '''combination''' of ''social aloofness'', ''literal communication'', ''few friendships'', and ''immersion in solitary interests'' paints a picture of Hopkins as a classic Asperger personality. His very limited social life was not merely due to religious devotion but also to a likely innate lack of social intuition and drive.